We go home and I began feeding Micah. Elizabeth is yelling from the bathroom for me to come. It's never good when my children are in the bathroom alone. With Micah in one arm and the bottle in the other I barge in the bathroom to find Hannah Kate sucking on a tube of toothpaste.
I survive until nap time. And the girls began signaling all the signs it's 'that time.' More whining. More attitudes. More breakdowns. I read Elizabeth 4 books instead of just the usually 1 and bribe her with a prize if she takes a decent nap. It didn't work.
Nap time sounds more like a party, multiple disciplines happen, and after an exhausting hour and a half, I look down at my snoozing little boy and contemplate bailing out. Just the two of us.
Instead I opt to read some parenting book. I can't get through but a couple of paragraphs before I have to deal with disobedient children again. They go through seasons of thinking they don't need naps. At the age of 3 and 22 months they know better than mama. And then 6pm rolls around and all hell is breaking loose in their little worlds. The mere fact somebody looked at somebody causes major break downs. It really makes for a great way to top off such a WONDERFUL day.
I got on facebook to check out for a bit. I saw one of my friends was selling unused diapers and bottles and other baby things. And I completely lost it. She lost her little girl 3 months ago. She never got to use any of those baby things that once decorated her house in expecting hope of her little girl coming home. I don't know difficult days like she knows them.
It's another reminder of Psalm 39. Even though it's felt like a hard day in the motherhood, at least it's been another day. The fact they are able to whine, argue, and melt down is a mercy. It means their hearts are pumping and blood is moving and their lungs are filling. Oh, to have this perspective when 6pm rolls around will be a miracle. But I'm praying God would grant me the grace to see what sweet gifts my children are on the most difficult days. Because even the most "difficult" days with them is enough to make it absolutely wonderful.